I haven't updated in eleventy billion years! (Not 11, not a billion, but eleventy billion )

I was abducted by Real Life. It happens to the best of us. *sheepish grin*

Title: A Meeting, Writing Prompt
Author: wiggly_toes
Characters: Ianto Jones, Me
Rating: PG (Nothing happens, but contains the word "shag")
Disclaimer: Despite my wishes to the contrary, I have no ownership of Ianto Jones, Captain Jack Harkness, The Hub, The Tourist Information Center, Cardiff, Wales, or anything else in this short piece of fiction that is even remotely familiar. All of the above is in fact owned by the BBC, and the intellectual property of one Russell T. Davies.
Summary: Writing Prompt: Choose a character from a story you have written or are in the process of writing, then write a scene or multiple scenes in which that character interacts with you, the author.

( The Meeting )

Is it just me, or do Tootsie Rolls look kind of like turds?

Okay, I know, this journal pretty much has flies buzzing around it from lack of use.

    Whatever, so I'm not an avid blogger, I have other incredibly attractive qualities! But I digress, right now I need to make some major life decisions and I'm freaking out about them. How do I make a decision about the rest of my life, when I'm only 1/4 of the way through living it? It seems pretty unrealistic to me. Anyone agree??? Yes? Yes? Thanks, I'm glad for the support.

   Alrighty, let's get into the meat of things, shall we? Some background: Currently, I'm on a semester off from a 4-year state school where I was studying Art education,  Criminal Justice,  Psychology. Because of my inability to make up my mind regarding my major and in turn, my future career, I am at the academic level of a Sophomore, as opposed to that of a Senior. This blows, and that's really all the comment I have regarding that aspect of the background info. I'm also working as a key holder at  a well-known trendy plus size clothing store at my local mall. This job has pretty much saved my life from the clutches of despair. Without this job to focus my energy into, I'm confidant that I would have combusted by now. I'm talking explosion into a fiery conflagration of DOOOOM (!) here. 
    Anyway,  I really, really love my job. I mean, LOVE love. Like the way that I love Gareth David Lloyd and want to do dirty things to his body kind of love. (not that I want to do dirty things to my job. XD) I've been thinking recently, that all of this aimless schooling is getting me nowhere. Why don't I go to school for something practical, something I already have a job doing, and something that my company may give me a scholarship to go to school for? This is how I came across fashion merchandising. I have a few aquantainces and a cousin go to school for this, so I was intruiged. My problem: I dont want to actually design. I really couldn't give a flying fart about designing, I just want to take what other people have made and make it look fabulous on the wall of some trendy boutique to the point where everyone who sees my wall needs to buy everything on it. I'm pretty ambitious if you couldn't tell.
    So, I want to become a fashion merchandiser and work as a district manager or some high up position at the store I'm currently working at. That's nice right? The problem, besides having to work my way up through the company, is that my school doesn't offer fashion merchandising, or anything relating to it. In fact, the only school that has a program that seems remotley reasonable is a 2 hour drive from my house and offers Retail Management and Fashion Merchandising as a degree. But get this...it's...a....COMMUNITY COLLEGE!!!!!! *dies*
    Now, here is the deal: I'm a smart girl. Really smart. Not blow things up with your mind smart or anything, but I'm pretty up there. Can I really bear the social stigma of going to a community college? I mean, I feel the need to explain to people now why I ended up at a state school, never mind why I'm still at the academic level of a Sophomore. Can I really hold an respect for myself if after all of these years of classes and money I end up with only an associates degree?????

Well, That's all for now. I figure that I need to tackle one problem at a time. And this is the one with the closest deadline. I know that there are only a few people that read this, but I'm not friends locking it, just in case someone stumbles across this by accident, I would love your input.

Hugs,
Jess
   

Why don't I ever write in here? I used to update this thingy all the time. I thinks I should get back into that habit. If I am engulfed by the trash in my room and suffocate to death, it would be nice to have some kind of written record of my existence floating around the web forevermore.  For serious though, that's one of the things that really freaks me out about the internetz. I had a friend pass away recently, and no one in her family has bothered to delete her facebook. I know, I know, it's very selfish of me. Obviously, this is the last thing on their minds and all. But to be completely honest, it really freaks the shit out of me to look at Harry Potter Magic Spells (or whatever that app is called) and see her face looming out from the "recent spellcasters section". It has me wanting to delete the app. Also, I have requests from her. Like, requests for me to get an app that I don't have. I don't want to delete them. I mean, she's dead. So they sit there, in Facebook limbo with the skeevy guy I've never heard of's friend request and numerous "Sailor Moon" requests and I have to see them every time I log on. *exasperated sigh* Am I the only one who thinks about these things? Why can't she just be alive? :( 

I miss Ian 

Concert Tonight!

That's all I have to say

I've been spending a lot of time thinking lately, actually, reflecting is a better word.

I've been spending a lot of time reflecting lately and I've come to a bitter conclusion: Last year I was smarter. Maybe not SMARTER because I did a lot or incredibly stupid things, but more witty, more reflective, more calm.

There have been a lot of things going on in my life, a lot of really shitty things. In the past, lets just keep using the last year example, I would bitch and moan, make funny jokes about them, enlist the help of friends to solve the problem using some kind of prop or theme,, and then I would make a comic about it. This year, I have completely removed myself from reality. I joke around with Ian, make up my own TV shows, make crazy old men voices, but then when the bills come I just have a breakdown for a day, do nothing, and continue my childish antics.

I don't do things. Nothing gets solved. I am awful to be around. So, since I am sitting here writing this, I plan on actually doing something, even if it's just one thing. One tiny, minuscule thing to resurrect old Jess. I'm going to shower, and then go deposit my paycheck, and then go pay a bill. See that's THREE things. Also, tonight, I have Acabellas. So you see, a rescue attempt is being made.

So, back to reflecting on my increased stupidity (which seems to be combined with awkwardness) I have a possible theory. Diet soda. You see, diet soda has a chemical called NutraSweet in it, which essentially obliterates your brain cells. It goes "pow pow pow" with its little nutra-guns and then BAM! You are stupider. So, considering the fact that since dinner last night (at ten when i got home from work) I have had 4 diet dews, (keep in mind that I didn't wake up until 1ish) I think I have found the culprit for the mass braincell murder. And all i have to say is, watch your back diet dew....it'll happen when you least expect it.... MUAHAHAHA.